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Players Who Just Plain Do Not Care

red hoodieThe two posts below are connected, submitted from the same user.

Players who just plain do not care

from user: UkeBard

After a very long campaign of about 8 months (my friend was the DM). The DM was narrating the ending. What happened to each of our characters in the long run, after our party disbanded.

Almost immediately as he started, one of the players (the host) walked over to his PlayStation and turned it on, completely ignoring the DM. Soon 3 of the 6 people in the group left the table to watch him play videogames3 of 6 people

I just gave him the most attention I could but was just fuming inside. I was so furious that they would dare to do something so incredibly rude. That DM clearly worked his ass off for us and they ignored the culmination of his work.

 

 

My Worst DM ever who haunts my nightmares

no dnd is better than bad dnd

from user: UkeBard

So this DM is not just the worst DM I’ve ever had (or heard of, even here), but also the worst player I’ve ever seen. (I will refer to him as Pat) He’s kind of part of my friend group so I used to be stuck with him for a majority of the time. As a young player, I stayed because I couldn’t find any other groups and I figured bad D&D was better than no D&D (I was wrong). As a player, Pat would:

-Metagame (while calling out others for metagaming over tiny things that weren’t metagaming)

-Constantly turn over the rogue to the guards or at least alert them whenever possible.

-Suck up to every powerful character and proceed to order them around (thankfully unsuccessfully we had a good DM)

-Be a munchkin

-Tell others how to play their character, usually based solely on their alignment. “You can’t do that because you’re chaotic”

-Then there was the time he got bored with his character and suddenly became suicidal (screwing over the DM who was relying on him for plot stuff)

This is just the list of difficulties I had with him as a player, so you can imagine how difficult he was as a DM. Also, his character died several times in my own campaign due to bad rolls/decision making and I think he might have held a grudge, which I believe might have contributed strongly to Pat’s behavior towards me in particular.

For simplicity, I’ve added chapter names because I realized this is a VERY long post. ????

1- Character Creation

2- The Crazy PC

3- The Bar Scene

4- OP NPCs

5- Lawful Good Mindflayers

6- The Maze Scene

7- My Death

His campaign was a pirate based campaign that ended up mostly on land with a lot of railroading and plot that made very little sense.

[Character Creation]

It all started with my character creation. I told Pat that I was going to play a Githyanki Bard named Jor-el from the astral plane who once piloted a space pirate ship. I also told Pat I’d be mostly using mental effects and some fear effects. To his credit, he allowed me to homebrew the Gith race (which didn’t exist at the time). But immediately after I made this character he announced that the campaign would entirely be us fighting against unintelligent undead and constructs. Obviously my spells weren’t going to be very helpful. I asked Pat if I could change my spells upon knowing that and he refused (btw we hadn’t actually started yet) so I had to slowly change my spells using the normal method and took lore bard.

I was a little suspicious at this point because it’s awful coincidental to theme TWO things that my character would have difficulty with (I can’t use a lot of my spells/can’t use my charisma). And also, it was very unusual to have a pirate themed campaign feature those two things. (I could maybe see undead pirates, but non-intelligent zombies can’t pilot a ship and constructs make zero sense).crazy rogue

[The Crazy PC]

While on the topic of character creation, Pat allowed one of the most disruptive character builds I have ever seen go unchecked for most of his campaign. (We will call this player C). C made a Rogue with a particular form of madness that caused him to crave magical items above all other things. This was his only roleplaying attribute.

In fact, C was so crazy that if he found out that you had a magical item he would first confront you and literally say “give me your magic item”. If you refused, he would walk away and then come back in the middle of the night to assassinate you. He refused to reason, in character and out.

So, I decided that because

  1. In-character I would want to kill him, and,
  2. Out of character I knew C was causing other players to not have fun (and C was kind of being a dick about roleplaying).

I decided to make a plan to assassinate the assassin. My plan was perfect. I spent two weeks preparing the trap OOC, keeping C in the dark OOC the whole time. I had bait, an explosive rune, off site location, this was the kind of thing my character would do, everything. I kept Pat up to date on everything I was planning, even drawing diagrams. When the session of the assassination attempt finally came, Pat started narrating C’s dream. This was not unusual, as he usually used dreams to force us to do things or push us towards the main plot.

So essentially, a GOD came to C in a dream and “cured him of his madness”. After this, Pat told me OOC that he wouldn’t allow me to kill C now because he had already fixed it. The DM had not discussed any of this with C ahead of time and C kind of got sick of his character because that was the only interesting characteristic he had. He ended up having to retire the character because everything was based around that one thing.

dnd tavern

From the 2000 movie “Dungeons & Dragons.” Terrible.

[The Bar Scene]

Then there is what I considered the worst scene in all of my D&D career: what I refer to as “the bar scene”. We had docked in a port and went to the local bar for drinks and merriment, and because Pat obviously railroaded us there. C (from earlier) had a bird on his shoulder and he said “I’m going to have my bird go shit on Jor-El. So Pat just narrated the bird shitting on me. I protested and asked for a roll against it, and the DM was like “whatever” and let me have a Dex check, which I passed with flying colors. Pat said I barely avoid it. So I addressed the bartender and said “Bartender! Can you please remove this wild animal that just shat on your floor from your bar?” The DM just narrated, saying “you look up and see about a dozen birds in the rafters”. I was kinda mad about that but I let it go. Then C announced that he was going to strike up a game of liar’s dice. (We actually play liar’s dice which is something I started in the game I DM’d for). So I pulled up a chair. He responded by saying he refuses to play Liar’s Dice with my character. I said too bad, it’s a public game. (Mostly to avoid being left out of the fun). In response, he draws his bow and shoots me. So I address the bartender saying, “Bartender! Can you stop this guy from shooting me in your bar?” Pat offers me a turn in combat and I use it refusing to fight him. At this point Pat narrates, “The bartender refuses to do anything because last week four people died in a barfight and he’s afraid to get involved.” The player continuously shoots me as I refuse to fight him until I’m down.

[OP NPCs]

Pat also had a serious problem with having ridiculously powerful NPCs. Between lvl 1 and 8 we met:a 20th level wizard, a 20th lvl paladin who interrogated us, 3 gods, a powerful vigilante with FOUR dancing swords, and a DMPC named Churchy who was a polymorphed ancient gold dragon (I’ll get to her later). Any interaction with these characters (trying to sneak by them, insight them, charisma rolls of any kind, etc) would result in a failure, no roll allowed. They would push us around and command us to go places in exchange for gold, even a couple times conscripting us into their armies.

The worst of all was Churchy. Remember that bird that tried to shit on me? Turns out that bird was a polymorphed ancient gold dragon with amnesia (the ultimate cop-out backstory) who later polymorphed again into a female human paladin of Bahamut and her name was Churchy. She was probably about 5 levels above us and had a magical sword that could shoot several lightning bolts a day. There was a combat where we were fighting 12 animated armors and Churchy went first. She made a lightning bolt that killed 8 or them at once then attacked twice, killing two more. The battle was over after the second person went. Eventually the other party members begged Pat into having her leave the party. My theory is that Pat missed powergaming and being a munchkin, so he made a character for himself.

mind flayer

Typical mind flayer from D&D 5E MM

[Lawful Good Mindflayers]

Pat would also manipulate my character into doing things that would get me in trouble. Most notably: Lawful Good Mindflayers. In case you didn’t know, Mindflayers are the sworn enemy of the Gith, as they once ruled over the Gith with an iron… tentacle? So because my character was a Gith I generally hated Mindflayers. Pat, knowing this, decided to inform me that there was a Mindflayer in the town we were in. I, playing my character, decided to run to find it. I arrived at the Mindflayer’s house and broke in. I suddenly was beset by an infinite number of guards, half of whom were veteran stats. I escaped using teleportation among other clever things and ended up on the rooftops. I had stupid high stealth rolls, but suddenly there was a vigilante in all black who confronted me. He informed me that the Mindflayer was a philantropist who cleaned the drinking water and built an orphanage. He then attacked me with four flying swords. (RAW you can only attune to 3 magic items and they have to be different) Even a cursory search on Mindflayers found that they:

were evil and sadistic aberrations, feared by sentient creatures on many worlds across the multiverse due to their powerful innate psionic abilities. Dwellers of deep Underdark areas, these alien humanoid-looking beings sought to expand their dominion over all other creatures, controlling their minds to use them as hopeless slaves and devouring their brains for sustenance.

I would have waved it off as “maybe this Mindflayer is the exception… except we ran into a second LG Mindflayer in that campaign.

 

[The Maze Scene]they arent going to give upmaze

There was a time when I was trying to hide while being chased down by a powerful guy and his goons. He sent a kobold and a minotaur into a small pocket dimension in which I was hiding. The PD had a hedge maze which led to an abandoned castle. It was a “coincidence” that he sent a minotaur when there was a labyrinth. I had gone into it because a follower of another PC attacked me and the party only saw when I responded in kind. So they all piled on and threw me into the pocket dimension… anyway… I saw the Minotaur and kobold coming, so I decided to hide. I had a cloak of spiderclimb and I used it to hide on the side of a 150ft tall tower, on the opposite side that they were approaching. I then cast invisibility and pass without trace. My roll for stealth was 30+ because of the pass without trace. The pair of grunts walked directly to the nearest tower window to me, craned their necks and pointed right at me. Apparently the KOBOLD had cast TRUESIGHT. So I swan dived from the tower and used Misty step at the last second to avoid fall damage (our group allows clever uses for spells). I was casting tons of spells and evading them. After a few minutes if this, Pat says “They aren’t going to give up, so I’m just going to roll for a number of hours it takes to capture you.”

[My Death]

After the maze scene, they dragged me out of the pocket dimension. The big baddie told me that he was going to execute me for leaving my party and for evading capture for so long. I said that my problem was with the NPC follower who attacked me originally, and I challenged him to a duel. I only asked that they let me rest so I could get my spell slots and health back. Pat’s response was “no, the NPC is not as powerful as you, so you have to be weaker”. They started us 60ft apart (because they knew I only had melee spells and weapons and the NPC only knew magic missile). It was just obviously no contest. My character died.

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DM Patrick

DM Patrick is a 20-year-hardened veteran of the awesome world and hobby that is table-top gaming. His primary passions include DMing for new players and bringing people into the hobby. He considers himself a "RPG Game connoisseur" and a master of none due to the fact that he's tried so many (both table-top and video games). He's been a full-time DM now for nearly 5 years and intends to remain the "Forever DM" for as long as he can survive because he's so passionate about what he does. By day, DM Patrick removes his DM screen and is known to the world as Patrick Flynn. He's a 35-year-old former Navy Submarine veteran from Ocala, Florida. If you want to know more about Patrick, roll investigation.

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