I, DM Patrick, have gone through and redacted or changed a few of the adult terms because I want this site to always be family-friendly. If ever you find anything that I post here to be something that you wouldn’t want your child to read, please let me know and I’ll mark it as such or outright remove it. These horror stories are otherwise unedited and I take no credit for them.
Misogyny at a Female DM’s Table? It’s More Likely Than You Think
from user: the-witty-one
I (21F) had been playing D&D 5e for about eight months at the time, and this was my first campaign in a setting of my own design. My table was comprised of all guys, 5 of whom are good friends of mine. One of them (we’ll call him Tate) was a pretty new player. Now, Tate is the kind of guy who doesn’t exactly have a filter. He’d gotten on another DM’s case for using a LEGO build to represent a giant warforged suit in a boss fight, he argued a lot with the more experienced players of the group, and all around had a bad attitude. He was insistent that he wasn’t nearly as nerdy as anyone at the table, and rolled his eyes when anyone talked about “Nerd Shit”. This was not a good fit for our table.
The players were fighting a group of harpies that were attacking some giant beetles (not important rn, just bear with me), and Tate was playing a College of Valor bard, a dwarf with a thick Russian accent. It was clear he didn’t know how to play a Valor bard, because he was on the very edge of the fight and almost never attacked anything with the magical battleaxe I specifically gave him. He was more interested in playing music from Spotify than actually playing the game. So, safe to say, people at the table were getting annoyed. Our cleric killed a harpy with Spiritual Guardians, and I described it as a beautiful angel picking the harpy up by the wings and flying into the sky with her. And Tate piped up, still in his Russian accent: “She got fucked. In the ass. And the titties. And the vagina.”
Now, I’m not one to start shit when shit doesn’t need to be started, but when players sit at my table I do ask that they be at least a little conscientious of the jokes they make. So I told him to stop, and he was like “what, I’m just making a joke.” Other players chimed in and told him it wasn’t funny, and he started to argue his case, but people were taking long enough with their turns, so I decided to just cut the argument off and move on.
This was kind of the breaking point for Tate’s relationship with our group, and eventually he left, and I have no idea if he’s still playing the game or not. For the sake of whichever poor nerdy women would have to play with him, I hope not.
I got screwed over because I didnt play a different race.
from user: AwsomeNoodlez
Warning: First time poster and mobile.
This was the first D&D session I ever played and it was the last too. I had rolled up a human bard for the adventure whilst everyone else had some kind of anthropomorphic animal such as dog people or Dragonborn.
Dm=Dm Me=Me O=Other player
Dm: Everyone is ready so let’s introduce our characters.
O: I’m playing the great dragonborn paladin named…
Me: Well I’m a human bard named Var…
O: Wait why are you a human? This is a role-playing game you can be anything you want.
I really brushed this off as a joke the group was making but, as we all know it wasn’t. So a little bit later we where resting in a tavern. O and I decided to got get some better weapons. (My shit was stolen by the rouge)
O: Can I have a crossbow?
Dm: Sure that will be 5 silver.
O: Could you upgrade it so it heats the bolts before it shoots it. (Half life crossbow)
Dm: That will be 10 gold but, it will take some time to make.
Me: Could I just get rapier?
Dm: Of course but it will cost 15 gold.
Me(out of character): Wait he just bought a half life two crossbow for 5 gold. How come I have to work over all my money for a sword?
Dm: Because you are a human. All humans are oppressed in this world.
Me: Um… Ok I’ll just steal it then I have a…
Dm: You can’t steal it…
Dm: Yeah I don’t like people becoming bad guys.
Me: You expect me to hand over all my cash for a sword without getting mad or stealing it?
Dm: Yeah I just don’t like people stealing from shops.
Me: Alright I guess I’ll just have to pay for it.
Me(In character): Here just give me the sword.
Dm: Sure thing.
Later we came across a cave and a couple of other players wanted to go into. Everyone thought it would be a good chance to get into a fight that wasn’t in a tavern.
Dm: You enter the cave and find a couple of small huts gathering around a campfire.
O: I’ll go check the tents for anything useful (Rolls a 10)
Dm: You find a couple of healing potions
Me: I guess I’ll do the same (Nat 20)
Dm: You find nothing
Me: Ok I guess I’ll watch around the cave for anything that looks like it could have come from those tents.
Dm: Alright. You stand ready to fight anything that enters the cave.
A few minutes later we where fighting a group of 5-6 goblins. I was slinging spells and singing songs. You know regular bardy things.
Dm: It sounds like something is bringing up the rear of the goblin pack.
Me: I’m going to cast thunderwave.
Dm: You might cause a cave in.
Me: I don’t care we are level 3 and whatever is com…
O: You’re level three?
O: We are level 15
Me: We just started how are you level 15?
O: Didn’t (Dm’s name) give you exp?
Me: Yeah but not in great big amounts.
Dm: It’s fine you’ll level up eventually
Me: It’s not ok! You’ve been screwing me over because I’m not playing as a damn dragon!
Dm: I’ve explained this. Humans are oppressed in this world and the dragonborn are the masters of the humans.
Me: You never told me any of this. You told we we where going to play Lost Mines.
After a few minutes of yelling I just got up and left because everything I wanted to do was shot down with the same excuse “Humans are oppressed.”
I haven’t played D&D since.
dm stopped my barbarian from raging and much worse
from user: Vinaguy2
A few years ago, I was dming a game. In that game was a player. That player decided to dm a game of his own and came to me for my opinion. I said sure, go for it. So he made a game in a homebrew world and invited a whole different group to play his game. 2 sessions go by and he asks me to come in and make a character to protect them since they are all squishy characters. I agree.
The cast for the game I was on was: Druid Rogue Wizard Barbarian (me) All 4th lvl
I get there and it takes some time for my character to be introduced, which is fine. BUT. The ways he describes this Island makes is seem like one half is a verdant jungle with tons of animals and the other is just a fiery hellscape, which made no sense to me, but its his first game, so its fine.
Then they come to a fishing village where me and the crew of my ship (Dm made me the captain to my surprise) are hanging at the tavern. I describe as my character is chugging mead.
This. Is. Where. Shit. Goes. Down.
Rogue says he want to steal my money, rolls terribly, so I see him with my passive 9 perception. My character grabs him and asks what does he think he is doing. Rogue says he tries to stab me. Fails and we both roll initiative.
I go first and I hit him with my great axe, crit and he goes down. Wizard and Druid come in. Druid transforms into a wolf with iron teeth for some reason and bites me. I hit him with my great axe w/reckless and greatweapon master and I rage. Wolf form drops and he takes some damage. Wizard casts scorching ray on me and it hurts.
A few rounds go by where I take down the Wizard and am about to take down the Druid when, out of nowhere, A LITTERAL FREAKIN GOD APPEARS, STOPS MY WEAPON IN MID AIR, HITS ME AND MAKES ME GO UNCONCIOUS!!!
…So… the druid heals everyone, except me, and the rogue steals my… everything except my axe. While I am asleep, the God says to me « I brought you here to protect them, not to fight them. As punishment, I shall take away your rage, reckless attack, greatweapon master abilities and your relentless endurence ». I wake up naked, with none of my abilities, one HP, my crew is gone, the others had time for a long rest, and on top of that, when I say my character tries to leave, I hear the God’s voice in my ear say no……
… at that point I stopped caring. We got to a tomb for some reason, fought a few zombies, even when I had 1 HP, and the priest that raised them. I took down 1 before I went down, the others killed the priest and the druid started to heal everyone… except… for… me. My character died like a little shit to a simple zombie because of shitty players and an even shittier dm.
And thats not the worst story I have from this dm.
A few weeks later, his game continued and one of the players brought his girlfriend in who played a tiefling. The dm came to me to ask me what were my thoughts on half-tieflings. I didnt know any better, so I told him to mix both of the races a little bit.
One day I speak with the girlfriend and ask her how the game is going. She says it sucks and she left the second time they played.
The reason why she left is because… one of the players jokingly said he wanted to [sexually assault] her character in her sleep. And the dm allowed it. When the player said he changed his mind, the dm forced him to roll an athletic check. He succeeded and… did the thing while the dm described it. That was her first session
Now remember how I said that the dm wanted to make a half-tiefling race. Well… the PC that [sexually assaulted] the Tiefling is a human. She got the news on her second session. Her character committed suicide and she completely abandonned dnd. I dont blame her. I kicked the dm out of the game I ran after that.
Player derails session, suicide by guards and quits because he didn’t get his way.
from user: halosos
I’m on mobile, please forgive any mistakes.
TL;DR at the bottom.
I’m DMing, going well so far. Party enter big city. Like 4-5 sessions in. Player, who I shall call Edgelord, was a Yaun-ti pureblood druid who worshipped an insane spider God from the desert.
There is a big market going on. Big festival where all the traders get her to sell their goods from distant lands. It was originally an excuse to introduce the players to how much diversity there was in my magical items generator while giving them the chance to buy some weak magic items and observing some strong ones, as well as buying weapons, ammo, spells and such.
The rouge goes and steals from the poorer stalls, farmers mostly.
The ranger goes looking for a new now and more arrows.
The barbarian doesn’t really do much but follow the ranger.
Edgelord druid. He goes to the exotic animals trader. He wants a pet displacer beast or a big cat.
I knew there is no way he can afford one, assuming they even have one. Let alone train and not get eaten by it. I roll for rarity of animals. 13.
They have a tiger, a panther and a jaguar.
He wants the panther. Merchant wants 1000 gold for it. Player tries to haggle. (He has 8 gold)
In his defense, he made a good argument and rolled well. Trader was happy to take 800 gold.
Edgelord turns around and starts cutting the ropes holding the panthers cage shut. Merchant is like “wtf stop it’s a wild hungry animal in a crowded market”. Edgelord continues. Merchant shoves Edgelord. Edgelord continues. Merchant punches and shouts for guards. Edgelord stops and slashes the Merchant. In the biggest market in the country. On the busiest day of the year. In the capital of said country.
Commoners have shite hitpoints. Enough damage was done to kill him. I try to dm in players favour to not derail. Guy is on the floor bleeding to death, let Edgy know that the guy can still be saved.
Edgelord kneels down to the guy. Stabs him right in his face. Many people are now shouting for the guards.
12 guards. All in chain mail. Short swords. I hate doing ‘plot armour’, but they all have buffed ac and have much more health. I want them to subdue Edgelord while making it harder for him to commit further crimes.
After attempting to fight them, he has a dagger and no armour at all, finally gets captured and taken to the dungeon in the central castle. Go back to other players who want to play seriously for a bit. They wonder where snake bitch (His character was female, btw) got to, but shrug it off, always been distant and has only known them for a few days.
Next day, guards come in, ask wtf. He rolls deception, fucking 18. Claims he is an assassin from the tifling nation. Bounty hunting is legal here and the merchant had a bounty.
Guards ask for proof. He pulls out some 500 year old crusty ass scroll with Abyssal on it (it’s his druid focusy thing) and says this is the bounty and permission to kill the merchant.
Guards leave. Go back to party doing normal shit.
Later, he is taken to another room, 2 people are sat at a table. Both formally dressed and very official looking. One is a teifling. Non teifling asks the same questions, Edgelord repeats, gets another good deception roll. Pulls out scroll. Teifling looks over it and shakes his head. (Spoiler, he can read Abyssal)
Edgelord, in his infinite wisdom, jumps over the table and starts beating the living shit out of the teifling.
Guards rush in, take him back to his cell.
Session ends with the players hearing about some terrorist execution. I gave him favourable conditions to get out of trouble. Then favourable conditions to lessen his trouble. Then conditions to not get his neck relieved from his head.
His final words, before the execution were “Fuck this, I’m out.”
TL;DR: Weak-ass druid didn’t have enough money for a panther, stabbed the merchant, battled guards and lied and punched himself to the headsman’s block. GG.